Many of you responded personally to my Pretty, Pretty Princess devotion yesterday, so I wanted to follow up on the subject. You expressed your struggle to conform to the world’s idea of beauty. At the same time, you also express a desire to adopt what God says is beautiful. That’s hard. I understand because I’m right there with you.

I, too, feel pressured to focus entirely on my outward appearance. I bounce from diet to diet and keep up with the latest fashion for hair, clothes, and makeup. When it comes to exercise, well, I rather someone beat with a whip. I do enjoy the occasional bike ride, hike, or swimming with the kids, but planned physical activity…I just don’t get it. I watch some women work out with such passion that I often wonder if they’re tying to reach their birth weight of 8 pounds and 7 ounces. Does that seem extreme to you or is it just me?

It’s all about balance. If I balance a healthy lifestyle then I’m going to be the size God made me. It may not be the size the world says I should be, if I’m comfortable there then what does it matter to the world?

I think a lot of our struggle is not the need to fit in, but be loved, valued, and accepted. Perhaps you have grown up in a home where love was seldom expressed, or you have had a distorted view of love and you feel that you’re incapable of truly loving others. Take heart. We can look to Christ as an example of how to love others and receive the love we need for ourselves.

Christ’s love for me and you sets the standard of how we should feel about ourselves and how we should love others. Imagine if growing up you and I were never taught what a fork and spoon were. Then, when food was placed in front of us, we’d have no idea how to eat it. We’d make a mess. Likewise, you and I make a mess of love, beauty and worth when it was not taught to us correctly.

The good news is God has loved us completely through His Son Jesus Christ. God knew that the best way to teach us ho to love was to show us how it is done. Throughout the Gospels, we see Christ’s love in action. We also see His love for each of us. The greatest act of love is laying down one’s life for another which is what Christ did for you and me on the cross. He paid a debt we could not pay. How many people do you know that would do that?

Because of His great love for us, no matter what we face or what the world throws at us we are able to endure when we hold it up to the backdrop of the cross. We not only find worth in God’s love, we find strength.

If you and I let God love on us today, tell us that we are His joy and delight and that He is well pleased with us, then we won’t need to impress or pretend anymore We can be satisfied with who we are and whose we are.

Labels: According to Micca

English was my worst subject in school. I hated it. Who cares what a participle is anyway? That was my attitude, and it showed in my grades until a new semester changed our lessons from grammar to writing. Suddenly, my disappointing “D” soared to an awesome “A.” Being a drama queen meant that story telling came easy to me. I still didn’t know how to label my sentences correctly, but as one teacher remarked, “I could express them in a way that you could smell, touch, taste, and feel.”

I never thought much about my writing. To me, the skill only helped balance my most challenging subject so that I made a better grade. Otherwise, I stuffed my gift deep within.

When I turned eighteen, people suddenly expected me to use my talents to change the world! There was only one problem. I didn’t have a clue what my talents were or how to use them.

I knew I wasn’t the sporty type. I had tried that. My last name carried a lot of weight being the younger sister of an all-star athlete like my brother. When I signed up for softball at the community center, the coaches actually fought over me until they learned I couldn’t play. Then, they traded me to another team. It was clear. Sports were not my gift.

I had also tried following in my sister’s steps by taking piano lessons. That didn’t go well either. The teacher told my mother that I was the only child she had ever encountered who came to class knowing less than the week before. That’s because I despised playing the piano. I would sit on the bench in our living room and dream about safari hunts in the back yard or bobby-pinning a yellow bath towel to my head, transforming myself into a princess with long blond hair. I could concentrate on many things, but not little black notes. They would trickle right out of my head.

Years later, I was reading my Bible in my bedroom when God called me to surrender my life to full-time service. I don’t claim to have heard the audible voice of God, but it was the loudest thought I ever had. At the time, I didn’t know what it all meant, but I responded wholeheartedly to God’s plan for my life.

Part of the Lord’s plan was to place me with Proverbs31 Ministries. While God was opening doors for me as a speaker, I never dreamed I would become a writer as well.

It began one day when Mary Southerland asked me to join her in writing a weekly devotion for the Proverbs 31 Speaker Team—which eventually turned into “Encouragement for Today” a daily devotion by Proverbs 31 ministries with over 200,000 subscribers!

I was honored, of course, to be asked. But mostly I was afraid until my fear eventually turned to panic!

“I can’t write! I can’t even spell!” I shouted to my husband.

“Who signed you up to write devotions?” he inquired.

“Mary did. Apparently, she thinks I can write,” I explained with fear and trembling.

I knew this was going to take a lot of discussion that could throw my willing, but not “created to talk about it for hours” husband into overload. Once again, I called my mother.

“HELP! I have to write a devotional,” I urgently explained.

“That’s wonderful,” mother replied with joy.

Confused by her remark, I wondered if mom had heard me correctly or not. She had.

“Micca”, she said. I knew when she began her sentence with my name that mom was about to say something important. “You are focusing on what you can’t do instead of what you can do,” she said in such a way that I recognized the tone and could see her expression in my mind’s eye. “Time after time, you have been commended by your school teachers, collage teachers, and even your seminary professor on your writing style, not your grammar. This is the way you are to express your gift. It’s what you’ve been waiting for. It’s time to write,” mom said proudly.

God uses mothers in so many ways…to comfort us, teach us, encourage us, and to discipline us. That day, God used my mother to open a world of dreams I never thought possible.

Are you like me, seeking the confidence and reassurance to let go of your fears and step out in faith? Then allow me to share some nuggets of truth that I hope will become stepping-stones into your future of writing.

First, you don’t need to be good at grammar to be a good writer. Sure, there are those that love the art of dotting every “I” and crossing every “T”, but we don’t all share that passion. Besides, if we were all good at grammar we wouldn’t need editors. People need people. God created us that way. He will place in your life a person with strengths where you are weak to balance your gift. Ask God to provide you with such a person. Someone is longing to come along side of you and use his or her gift as well.

Second, don’t try to copy the technique of anyone. You are uniquely designed. God didn’t create you to fit in, but to stand out through your own style. You have a specific way of communication through writing. Find your voice by simply writing letters to your family and friends. The way you express yourself in common everyday experiences is your individual voice that reflects your own method. There are many writers, but your style is one of a kind.

Third, the key to writing is…revise, revise, and revise again. Don’t ever expect your first draft to be your final copy. Striving for perfection the first time around will cause you to struggle for words. Begin by writing whatever comes to your mind. Then, go back and revise. Shorten your sentences, add some adjectives, and write in your transition sentences. For words that are repeated often, use your thesaurus to find a different word with the same meaning. It will make your writing more interesting.

Writing is like any other gift in that it has to be practiced. If God is not opening doors right now for your talent, don’t let it become dormant. Keep writing, so that when the time is right, you are ready to step through that open door into a world of expression where words are countless, dreams are real, and possibilities are endless.

This was taken from an excert of "For the Right Reason" by Marybeth Whalen http://www.marybethwhalen,blogspot.com

If you feel God is calling you to write or speak, then check out our annual Writer/Speaker's Conference called She Speaks. http://www.proverbs31.org

Labels: According to Micca

Book end prayer is what I like to call prayer that remembers to thank God for His answer. In years past and sometimes even now, I have to admit that I forget to say “thank you” to God. How rude of me!

Lately, I’ve been thinking about this because I’ve had so much to be thankful for. As I pray and intentionally seek God’s activity in my life, it’s as if I can see Him who is unseen.

I’ve been praying for snow this winter. I love snow, but in the South it’s a rarity. This year we haven’t had large amounts of snow fall, but we have had snow! Just this morning, it was snowing. Once my husband and kids were gone for the day, I sat wrapped in a warm blanket and sipped my coffee as I watched the snow fall. There’s something about watching the snow floating from the sky to the ground that is soothing and peaceful. As I mediated on God’s beautiful creation, I was compelled to thank Him for snow and the wonderful morning it provided for me.

I needed serenity today. I’m on the last lap of finishing my book. The days have been long and stressful at times, but God has guided me all the way. As I’ve sought Him daily and poured my request before Him, His presence has been felt, His hand has been sure, His strength has enabled, and His provision has been amazing!

God always provides for our needs. Long before God called me into ministry, He was preparing me. I became a student of His Word under the leadership of Kay Arthur. For over 15 years of studying Precept, God said it was time and separated my life for His service. Now that I’m writing, it seemed only natural to ask Kay Arthur, my mentor and teacher, to endorse my book. When I mentioned it others in the publishing arena, they felt that most big names would have a no endorsement policy. I heeded to their advice and forgot the whole thing. However, God kept orchestrating my circumstances placing me in front of Kay and allowing me the honor of sharing how God used her ministry to prepare me for mine. So, I decided to ask.

Long story short, she endorsed my book! A few days later, I received an email from Jan Silvious of Woman of Faith. Another speaker/author I greatly admire and whom I asked for an endorsement. She, too, gave me one. I was overwhelmed. These may be big names in the industry, but my God is bigger! …And I didn’t forget to bookend the experience by thanking God for His loving care.

God’s answers don’t always come the way we expect or with celebration on our lips. I’ve also been praying for my son, Mitch. He owns and condo and lost his job recently. Not a good thing when you have a house note. Apparently, he lacks the ability to hold his tongue when others are jumping down his throat. He attacked back and lost his job. I asked him, “Don’t you know that the best way to keep someone from jumping down your throat is to keep YOUR MOUTH SHUT?!” A lesson he is no doubt learning.

At first, it didn’t make sense that he lost his job even through it wasn’t a good job. I couldn’t help but think, “Hummm…how is this answer to my prayer?” As he came to his dad and me for advice and direction in his life, it was then that I realized God had answered my prayer and was at work in Mitch’s life. Direction was what I had been praying for but when you child is old enough to live on his own; you have to wait for them to come to you. Well, here he is allowing his dad and I to speak into him words or wisdom.

Even when God’s answers seem strange at first, we need to rejoice and be thankful anyway. His ways are higher than ours and we must believe that He always has our best interest at heart whether it appears so or not.

What can you be thankful for today…your job, your health, your children, your home, the food on your table? Take a moment and bookend your prayer by thanking God for His loving provision in your life today.

Labels: According to Micca

Happy Valentine’s Day!

I can remember growing up and listening to Tina Turner’s sing, “What’s love got to do—got to do with it? What’s love but a second hand emotion?” In high school, love was a second hand emotion. Here today and gone tomorrow. While love is a delicate emotion, most handled it without proper care. It was given and taken, used and abused, and for some…it was not offered at all. Day’s like today almost seem to spotlight those who feel unloved and alone.

This type of experience can make a person doubt love for the rest of their lives—even the love of God. Their attitude seems to shout, “What’s love got to do with it?” As if they could survive without it. None of us can. We were created to be loved.

In fact, love has everything to do with it. God so loved you and me that He sent His son to die in our place so that we could have forgiveness of sins and eternal life. Love is the greatest gift God has to offer you and me. And He doesn’t just offer it on Valentine’s Day. It’s ours to receive each and every day.

Yet some resist God’s love. Because of their past they have a hard time believing that God loves them. Nothing is further from the truth! Paul confirms this when he wrote, “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:38-39).

Some have the wrong view of God’s love. They believe that have to do something to earn His love. While others fear they can loss God’s love. Neither is true. There is nothing we can do to earn God’s love. He offers it freely and unconditionally. Even when we sin, God is ready to offer us grace and forgiveness if we will turn back to Him. That’s love at its best!

If we will let it, God’s love will transforms our lives. Instead of being self-focused, be God focused. Watch for His activity of love and grace at work in your life. Note His answered prayers and the ways He lovingly cares for you and your needs. These expressions of love are able to fill all hearts until all our hurts are healed. But most time they go unnoticed because you and I are looking at our problems instead of God’s provisions.

When you and I finally understand that God’s love has everything to do with us, then we begin to recognize that His love is true and reliable. It has no end. It’s incomprehensible, but it’s real and able to fill up all our empty places. When that happens and we are made whole, every thing thereafter has to do with love…every person we meet, every word spoken, every act we do…all because the love of God fills our hearts today and always.

May you be blessed with the gift of God’s love today.

Labels: According to Micca

It’s almost here. “What is?” you ask, “Valentine’s Day?” Well, you can call it that but according to my husband, you might as well call it FREE S*^ Day! You see, he views his romantic life much like a bingo card—desperately trying to land a win with me. In his mind, every time he folds the laundry, he’s get a chip. If he takes me out to eat, he get a chip, if he loads the dishwasher, he gets a chip. Little does he know that I could gladly love him without all this effort, but let’s keep that between you and me.

For him, Valentines Day is like the free square in the middle of the card. And that free square stands alone! He doesn’t need a diagonal or straight across the board, nor does he need a new shirt, cologne, or a new golf club. All he needs is his free square on Valentine’s Day.

I realized how much romance meant to him when our kids were small. I’d spend the whole day caring for the kids and by that evening, I was exhausted. I’d plop down on the couch wearing a mix bouquet of formula and diaper ointment. My hair would tangled with cheerio’s and the closest I got to make-up for the day was dried green peas smeared across my face. You’d think it would be enough to repel any man. Right? Wrong! My husband would sit down beside me and give me the look. You know the look. All I could think was… “You’ve got to be kidding me!”

Over the years, I’ve learned the importance romance plays in a man’s life. It affects their whole well-being. If they know that they are loved by their wife, there’s nothing they can’t do…or do for you! So, girls, you and I don’t have to spend a lot of money on Valentine’s Day or search the stores for the perfect gift. Just send the kids to grandma’s, cook a romantic dinner for two, eat it on the living room floor surrounded by candle light, and then, present your gift…a bingo card! It will be a Valentine’s Day to remember!

Labels: According to Micca

My husband and I are opposites. I’m a free-spirit where as he’s more on the conservative side. I guess its true---opposites attract. It works for us. You might say we complete each other. I encourage him to fly while he balances my feet and keeps them steady on the ground. I like this about him and I’m learning more and more to listen to his wise counsel.

I tend to be spontaneous and forget to look ahead. Not my husband. He’s always planning ahead. While we don’t always see eye to eye when planning for the future, in the end I’m always glad I let him lead. For example:

I’ve always loved fashion and try my best to dress in style. When the catalogs arrive at my house, I make mental notes as I flip through the pages of the latest styles in clothes, shoes, and hair-do’s. When finished, I can tell you what’s hot and what’s not. I can also tell you what the new color is for the winter, spring, summer and fall.

The only problem is after I look, I covet. I want all the new fashions. Not just one or two pieces will do. I must have them all and the accessories to match! After I’ve gathered this information and my heart is pounding with desire, I have to convince my husband that I need to SHOP!

He’s always been understanding and had no problem with me buying a new item or two. However, this time Pat reminded me that we were planning for our summer vacation. Therefore, we didn’t have any extra money to spend. I was disappointed, of course, but being the good wife that I am, I didn’t go. Instead, I cleaned the house to release my shopping energy.

As I dusted the top of our high-boy hutch in the bedroom, seven one hundred dollar bills came floating down on top of me. My first thought was—now I can go shopping! My second though was—Ah, Ha! That rascal told me we didn’t have any money. Fanning the money in front of his face, I blurted out in a suspicious tone, “Care to explain why there is seven hundred dollars lying around our bedroom?”

It turned out he was saving the money for our family vacation. “You’re welcome to spend it on clothes, but if you do, we can’t go on vacation. We just don’t have the money to do both.” He said in the calm way that he always speaks when I’m riled up. Then he continued. “What would you really like to have; new clothes or lasting memories of our family vacation?” He’s usually not that good. But, nevertheless, he was right. As it turned out, it was a vacation to remember!

As a woman, I tend to make decisions based on my emotions. I’m not saying my feelings are entirely wrong. They are just not entirely dependable. I guess that’s why God provided me with a husband who can make good decisions based on our needs instead of my greeds. Isn’t that just like God---always looking out for us providing strength when were weak; hope when we’re discouraged, and wise counsel when the shopping bug bites!

Labels: According to Micca

I was speaking with a northern friend today who reminded me that southern women have a unique way of communicating that is simply charmin’. I couldn’t agree more!

Southern women appreciate their natural assets:
Clean skin.
A winning smile.
That unforgettable Southern drawl.

Southern women know their manners:
"Yes, ma'am."
"Yes, sir."
"Why, no, Billy!"

Southern women have a distinct way with fond expressions :
"Y'all come back!"
"Well, bless your heart."
"Drop by when you can."
"How's your Momma?"
"I'm going to kick your hind end all the way to the curb"

Southern women know their summer weather report:
Humidity
Humidity
Humidity

Southern women know their vacation spots:
The beach
The rivuh
The crick

Southern women know the joys of June, July, and August:
Colorful hi-heel sandals
Strapless sun dresses
Iced sweet tea with mint

Southern women know everybody's first name:
Honey
Darlin'
Shugah

Southern women know the movies that speak to their hearts:
Fried Green Tomatoes
Driving Miss Daisy
Steel Magnolias
Gone With The Wind

Southern women know their country breakfasts:
Red-eye gravy
Grits
Eggs
Country ham
Mouth-watering homemade biscuits with momma's homemade jelly

Southern women know their cities dripping with Southern charm:
Chawl'stn
S'vanah
Foat Wuth
N'awlins
Addlanna

Southern women know their elegant gentlemen:
Men in uniform.
Men in tuxedos
Rhett Butler

Southern girls know their prime real estate:
The Mall
The Country Club
The Beauty Salon

Southern girls know the 3 deadly sins:
Having bad hair and nails
Having bad manners
Cooking bad food

More Suthen-ism's:
Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them.

Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up "a mess."

Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of "yonder."

Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is, as in: "Going to town, be back directly."

Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.

All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.

Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin!

Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and "a right far piece." They also know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or 20.

Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.

No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn.

A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.

Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, .. and when we're "in line," . we talk to everybody!

Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related, even if only by marriage.

In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is plural.

Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.

Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.

When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," you know you are in the presence of a genuine Southerner!

Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk." Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened. "Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk.

And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,"Bless her heart" ... and go your own way.

To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness: Take two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning. Bless your heart!

And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this Southern stuff, ... bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have classes on Southernness as a second language!

And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long time, all y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls front porch that reads "I ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could."

Southern girls know men may come and go, but friends are fahevah !

If you're a Northern transplant, Bless your little heart, fake it.

Labels: According to Micca